The KICK: ASS was an ACF tournament held at Washington University on April 15, 2000. UMR's team, consisting of Paul Nelson, Mike Raska, Melvin Harris, Brenda Driver, and Garrett Struckhoff, faced off against ten other teams. Both Division I and Division II teams competed in the tournament. UMR sent a Division II team to KICK: ASS. The results are as follows:

# Match 1: Played Northwestern University (II); lost 125-80.
# Match 2: Played Kentucky Jejune (II); lost 150-0.
# Match 3: Played DePauw Ducks (II); won 165-15.
# Match 5: Played 3 Goys and a Boy (I); lost 295-10.
# Match 6: Played Androstenedione Quintuplets (I); lost 245-0.
# Match 7: Played Three Guys, a Girl, and a Buzzer (I); lost 230-45.
# Match 7: Played Illinois Brad Majors (I); lost 120-90.
# Match 8: Played Kentucky Skulduggery (I); lost 365-15.
# Match 9: Played Illinois Janet Weiss (I); lost 285-60.
# Match 10: Played Leningrad Cowboys (I); lost 50-40.
# Match 11: Played Leningrad Cowboys (I); lost 65-15.
# Match 12: Played DePauw Ducks (II); won (results unrecorded).

UMR finished 10th out of 11 teams. The results were rather disappointing when compared to UMR's performance throughout the 1999-2000 year. On a more positive note, Ben Lea, the ACO faculty advisor for 1999-2000, was a member of the Androstenedione Quintuplets, who came in 4th place in the tournament.