Useful (?) English System conversions/units:

 Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter: Eskimo Pi

 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital:   1 I.V. League

 2000 pounds of Chinese soup:  Won ton

 1 millionth mouthwash: 1 microscope

 365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling: 1 lite year

 Half of a large intestine: 1 semicolon

 1000 aches: 1 kilohurtz

 Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 hoarsepower

 Shortest distance between two jokes: A straight line

 Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement: 1 bananosecond

 1 million microphones: 1 megaphone

 2000 mockingbirds: two kilomockingbirds

 1 kilogram of falling figs: 1 Fig Newton

 1 millionth of a fish: 1 microfiche

 8 nickels: 2 paradigms

 1 million bicycles: 2 megacycles

 365.25 days: 1 unicycle

 10 cards: 1 decacards

 1000 grams of wet socks: 1 literhosen

 1 trillion pins: 1 terrapin

 1 million billion picolos: 1 gigolo

 10 rations: 1 decoration

 100 rations: 1 C-ration

 10 millipedes: 1 centipede

 3 1/3 tridents: 1 decadent

 10 monologs: 5 dialogs

 5 dialogs: 1 decalog

 2 monograms: 1 diagram

 2 wharves: 1 paradox

 1/2 lavatory:  1 demijohn

 454 graham crackers:  1 pound cake

 2 snake eyes:   1 paradise