You may be a Chemist if:
• you wash your hands BEFORE going to the bathroom.
• you can't see the word molasses without thinking of a joke.
• you can sing the periodic table.
• you can think of six mnemonic devices but can only remember
what one of them
• you can't watch a pharmaceutical commercial without correcting
• you become preoccupied thinking about the wave function of a
• you think about designing a container for a universal solvent.
• the only lab experiments you remember are those that you
• the only lab experiments you talk about are those that somebody
else screwed up.
• you read the word "unionized" without any thoughts of labor and
• you look at yourself in a mirror and try to decide which is D and
which is L.
• you truly believe that a neat desk indicates a frightened mind.
• you think mathematicians are less nerdy than physicists.
• you worry about how they get Teflon to stick to the pan.
• you think of the laboratory as "the real world".
• several of your colleagues remind you of John Forbes Nash, Jr. in
the movie "A
Beautiful Mind" - without the brilliance, of course.
• you observe National Mole Day on 10/23, and have even
• you think Chemistry is pHun.
• you put your coat on after you get to work.
• after a few drinks, you think you're spinning at your "magic